A 7.3 magnitude earthquake has hit eastern Japan again friends. This one was off the coast off Touhoku again and was felt in Tokyo Town. I am safe friends, and I hope you are too.
Say, when y'all came over and signed up for that ESL professional job making 200,000 Yens a month, did y'all expect you might die one day in an earthquake? I sure hope y'all at least considered it.
THE LAST MEMORIES OF AN ESL TEACHER IN JAPAN:
I'M GOING TO DIE BECAUSE OF A FUCKING EARTHQUAKE
I WILL NO LONGER BE ABLE TO BE AN ESL TEACHER
OH SHIT
Stay safe out there my ESL teacher friends. And don't forget to listen to my podcast about how to survive the big one that's overdue to hit Tokyo Town.
Friends, there are a lot of people around Tokyo Town who wish they were the only gaijin in the village. That's right, the only gaijin in the village. Well friends, there are all kinds of behaviors that these gaijins have to keep their little fantasy going. What tactics do you employ to ensure that your special-gaijin-in-Tokyo bubble is strong?
WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU SEE
ANOTHER GAIJIN IN JAPAN
There are many ways friends, but tell me something. What do you do when you return to your gaijin house with paper thin walls and another 12 gaijins all living together sharing the same toilet? It's gotta be hard to keep the bubble then friends.
THE SHIBUYA CROSSING, SHIBUYA WEST STATION EXIST, SHIBUYA, 'THE BU', SHIBUYA-KU, TOKYO, JAPAN
The crossing is featured in that movie Lost in Translation (2002). It is something that everyone who has visited Tokyo knows about. Few however brave the crossing more than once as they realize that crossing the street with so many people and taking photos of their achievement so that they can say to their folks and friends at home 'I AM IN JAPAN!' is lame and tendentious douchebaggery of the highest order. Take care friends. Peace Tokyo Joe
Just in time for that weekly event that the ESL professionals in Japan look forward to every week ie Saturday night to Sunday night - otherwise known as 24 hours off - Mud diving J girls in outfits. And for them ESL teachers who especially love this kind of thing, a warning: don't beat off too much to this video because remember, you will need to get back to class on Monday to pay the rent for your closet sized paper thin walled 'room' at your gaijin house. It is from the famous Japanese game show entitled simply "泥の水たまりに飛び込む" or "Jump Into Mud Puddle"
Ten years since Lost in Translation was filmed here in Tokyo Town. That's a long time friends. And yet it still feels like yesterday.
Friends,
the rumors are that the characters in Lost in Translation are based on real people in the 90s
and 00s who lived in Tokyo Town. Well friends, they are not based on me, but there have been a
few people just like them over the decades. The great thing
about this film is that there aint no other white people in Tokyo except
the characters and the two blowhards at the bar, and friends, there
aint not too many of these in Tokyo these days either, because they all
mostly live in Hong-Kong now after the big shake on 3/11.
Much
like BOB HARRIS played by Bill Murray., who shows every inch of his
years in this film all over his face, Tommy Lee Jones did print ads for
Suntory Boss coffee, and also many television commercials as you can see
if you do a search on the YouTube. Both Bill and Tommy Lee have the
scars and both make excellent commercials friends. Personally I like the
whiskey better than the coffee.
Rain in the Streets of Tokyo
Cameron Diaz used to hang out in Tokyo back before her 20s, around Roppongi
and Roppongi Hills and is the alleged inspiration for the blonde character, Ribisi's
character is based upon the hipsters that come to Tokyo for 5 minutes
to do
their work in the entertainment industry, they come and go friends,
there are many of these "hipster cool cats" who think they are a great
gift to Japan, and well friends, they are not, but they sure are
entertaining to watch.
Scarlet's character CHARLOTTE is based upon the people who come to Japan
without a clue what happens here, either with an SO or alone, and who find it
bewildering and interesting without knowing what goes on, I meet a lot of girls
like this here.
The whole movie is an inspiration friends, and made 10 years
ago back when Tokyo
was safe to live in, pre 3/11.
The
film is the inspiration that launched tens of thousands of Bachelor of
Useless Degree grads into Japan, they came friends, in the 00s, and they
came to teach at the ESL "sweatshops" you can read about here in Tokyo Town at the forum and on the J blogosphere.
So many of these people wanted to live like Bob and Charlotte,
but they do not friends. They did not find the Lost in Translation
dream. No Sir, all they find is that they are barely making 2000 dollars
a month and can eat cat food from konbinis that no one in the film ate,
until they realized five or ten years later that they have wasted time
in Japan and have no real career here. It is very sad friends, they came
inspired and left demoralized.
THERE'S
GOTTA BE 'MORE THAN THIS IN TOKYO, MORE THAN WORKING AS A "RETARDED ESL
CHIMP" - WELL THERE IS - BUT ONLY IF YOU ARE BOB HARRIS AND THERE AINT NONE OF YOU AROUND TOKYO TOWN LIKE BOB HARRIS FRIENDS.
Every
night, there are tourists who come to Tokyo and go to the Park Hyatt
bar, to try to live the Lost in Translation dream, and friends they do
not find it either. They go to the New York bar here, and I see them, I
hear them, and even meet them. They feel that their five days in Tokyo
means they experience the Tokyo, well friends, they are wrong also. The
first 40 years in Tokyo are the hardest friend, so they do not get the
real LIT experience, because they are not Bob Harris and did not make 2
million dollars by acting in a commercial.
So friends, the dreams
of tens of thousands of Wapanese Wannabes were launched by this film,
and shattered too. It is quite interested to see that Bob and Charlotte
were not depicted giving each other head or ****ing each other on
screen, however, that probably did happen in the movie, just not on
film.
So ten years friends, it came and went so quickly and many
of us here didn't even see the film until 2005 or some year after it was
released in my case I don't think I have watched the whole film.
LOST IN TRANSLATION - LIFE IN TOKYO
BOB HARRIS STYLE
JUST LIKE HONEY FRIENDS,
THIS FILM IS SWEET AND STICKY
LIKE CHARLOTTE'S ***** LIPS
Tokyo is Tokyo friends, ten years is ten years, and ten
years on not a lot has changed.
Take care friends and please check the YouTube channel and my personal one hour review of Lost in Translation (Part 1 is up already).
If you liked this film then that is great, because I am with you. I
liked it too. But friends, Tokyo aint like this in real life
No it aint. And let me tell you why. If you listen to some of my podcasts you will see but let me explain it here.
Tokyo is full of a lot of people who come over with 10 dollars in
their pocket and frankly are struggling to survive here as ALTs and
English Teachers. They do not do very well. Lost in Translation has characters with time, money and a taste for
luxury much like me. See, when I first came to Japan there was gold in
the streets and you could make money. I was lucky had the contacts and
made money even before I cam here but did very well years and years ago
and have been retired for some time. Today? I see these kids coming over, staying practically on the
street or with a friend if they are lucky, some of them live in Gaijin
Houses where there are 10 people sharing 1 toilet and bathroom and
kitchen and they are struggling! They can barely pay rent, and they work
as teachers (but really are nothing more than
clowns/babysitters/entertainment for the people they teach) and make
very little money. We are talking about 1.5k-2k a month if they are
lucky which will buy you nothing in Tokyo.
Bob and Charlotte types? Well I never really see them except people
who come and visit for a few days, but not even at Charlotte's age, as
they tend to be older to have the money to burn on hotel rooms like the
Park Hyatt in Shinjuku. Of course, there are very few people like Bob.
Only Brad Pitt or Arnie or someone of that fame is anything like Bob.
Even Tommy Lee Jones didn't get paid as much as Bob for his Boss Coffee
commercials.
So before you come to Tokyo friends I have some words of advice.
Save your money and come and live like the characters in this movie do.
Spend when you are here but do not expect to earn or live the dream
here. It happens to very few people and I would say about 1 in 10,000
actually get wealthy here in Japan these days. If you want to know why
you can see the direct link here.
Any questions will be answered without a problem. Take care and
enjoy Japan, just do it with some sense of who you are and money in your
pocket, like the characters in this movie. Then you will have the real
LIT experience which I can tell you personally is like no other. It is
much like the movie, dreamy, bittersweet, strange and wonderful.
Japan Bash is the latest site Ive been referred to by some of the more outspoken and jaded ESL teachers around Tokyo Town (otherwise known colloquially as 'eikaiwa monkeys') and I will review it very shortly for the forum. In the meantime, give this gentleman's website a visit on the internets and let him know Tokyo Joe sent you. Peace Tokyo Joe
You may not be able to visit or live in Tokyo Town today, tomorrow morning, next week, next month or even next year. but you can take the first step and every journey begins with the first step, and friend, I am here to make the journey easier. I am Tokyo Joe and i know Tokyo. If you have ever wished to live the dream life in Japan there are ways that your dreams can come true. some are easier than others. either way friends, your Tokyo dreams will come true. How do i know? Because they do for people just like you every day and because i know they will. Peace.Tokyo Joe
