Gaijin vs Gaijin and Being Big in Japan - The Debate Ends Here

Friends, last year I posted a series of videos explaining to all the folks out there the Gaijin vs Gaijin situation here in Japan. It is quite interesting to watch. Now, other publications in Japan have picked up on my theme and made a big hu-has about it. Well friends, you can get the original Tokyo Joe Gaijin vs Gaijin story here because I know about Gaijins in Tokyo - I've been one for decades and I've seen yall come and go with your Lost in Translation Pipe Dreams and your ESL dreams and bunny outfits working for them factories called eikaiwas. Well, pop open your dollar fifty can of Asahi and get your karaage and listen to the original Gaijin vs Gaijin tales here on the podcast.

Take care friends.

GAIJIN VS GAIJIN - WHY SOME GAIJIN IN JAPAN FEEL LIKE KINGS WHEN THEY AINT

GAIJIN VS GAIJIN - WHY MANNERS ARE IMPORTANT IN JAPAN

HOW TO BE BETTER THAN THE OTHER GAIJIN IN JAPAN AND TOKYO TOWN

7.3 Earthquake Hits Eastern Japan - December 7, 2012

A 7.3 magnitude earthquake has hit eastern Japan again friends. This one was off the coast off Touhoku again and was felt in Tokyo Town. I am safe friends, and I hope you are too.

Say, when y'all came over and signed up for that ESL professional job making 200,000 Yens a month, did y'all expect you might die one day in an earthquake? I sure hope y'all at least considered it.

THE LAST MEMORIES OF AN ESL TEACHER IN JAPAN: 

I'M GOING TO DIE BECAUSE OF A FUCKING EARTHQUAKE I WILL NO LONGER BE ABLE TO BE AN ESL TEACHER

 OH SHIT

Stay safe out there my ESL teacher friends. And don't forget to listen to my podcast about how to survive the big one that's overdue to hit Tokyo Town.

HOW TO SURVIVE THE FORTHCOMING TOKYO EARTHQUAKE

WITH WHISKEY, GOOD FOOD, AND BITCHES.

AND MORE WHISKEY.

Gaijin vs Gaijin - What do you do when you see another gaijin on your turf?

Friends, there are a lot of people around Tokyo Town who wish they were the only gaijin in the village. That's right, the only gaijin in the village. Well friends, there are all kinds of behaviors that these gaijins have to keep their little fantasy going. What tactics do you employ to ensure that your special-gaijin-in-Tokyo bubble is strong?

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU SEE 

ANOTHER GAIJIN IN JAPAN

There are many ways friends, but tell me something. What do you do when you return to your gaijin house with paper thin walls and another 12 gaijins all living together sharing the same toilet? It's gotta be hard to keep the bubble then friends.

Cloud Atlas, Yellow Face, Danny Choo, Anime Movies and Other Goings On.

Cloud Atlas and the Yeller Face Issue. Yeah, that's right. The Yellow Face thing.

Friends, there are more issues than just the yeller face issue in Cloud Atlas. The film is thought provoking on many levels. There are gender identity issues too, which in many respects stand out in the film more than the racial issues. There’s gay sex too, but that didn’t offend me. Neither did the suicide parts. But what is race anyway? I am a white man in Tokyo Town. I face the issue of not being Japanese. I will never be Japanese, nor do I want to be. I’m not here to change their culture. Influence it sure. What hasn’t the west done in the last 70 years, or 150 years to influence J Culture? There aint much friends. It has done a lot. And they sure have done a lot for us too friends. But let’s talk about this wonderful film. There are not just yeller face issues, but K Face (that’s Korea Face), P Face (that’s Polynesia Face), and white face issues. In fact, I’ll tell you about a white face issue right now. In Tokyo Hands, you can buy yourself a white man costume for Halloween or your house warming party. Either way friends, a white man costume is a white man costume. And I aint offended. Heck, next Halloween I might even buy myself a white man costume and go as a white man dressed up as a white man. It would be fun. But there’s another issue in the film Atlas Cloud. How about an actor from Australia dressing up as a German? Is there a G face issue (that’s German face)? If I put on a German lederhosen and start doing the chicken dance at Oktoberfest, and start yellin’ out German beer phrases, and eating the sausages and drinking the beer like a German, will there be a problem? Will the Germans get upset and start saying that I am a G Face racist? I sure hope not friend, because I do this every month or so for my beautiful Miss Yamada when she comes over to the apaato dressed up like Little Snow White. We sure have our fun friends. And let me tell you something about this Cloud Atlas film. I know the Danny Choo fans around the world are gonna love this film. Why? Well because Tokyo Joe understands that one of the plots in the film (Neo Seoul, 2144 – Old Seoul is apparently underwater) resembles a live action anime plot. And actually, I aint no otaku, but I kind of liked it. It was like Jesus in woman form meets Akira meets Blade Runner meets the Island by Michael Bay meets Soylent Green. And that my friends blows my mind. It was real clever.

CLOUD ATLAS - THE BEST LIVE ACTION ANIME MOVIE EVER?

**** YEAH

But this is the one where the people are going on in the IMDB forums about the yeller face. And I do not understand it. Shouldn’t it be called K face? And why is an actress from Chinaland dressing up and pretending to be a Korean? Isn’t this K face stuff racism, pure and simple. I sure know a lot of Korean folks who would take offense at say Danny Choo, or another person from Chinaland dressing up or pretending to be a Korean. But we all know Choo dresses up as a Stormtrooper – and aint the Stormtroopers all white? They sure sound white in the movies friend. So who does Darth Vader feel about all this? Or Grand Moff Tarkin? Or Palpatine? Or the Trekkies? How do the Japanese feel about Danny Choo, a man from Chinaland, or somewhere - he's pure Chinaland-person right? - going around Tokyo Town speaking the Japanese? They probably don’t care for the most part. But this yeller face racism nonsense has got to stop. There were white actors dressed up as black, polynesian, and women dressed as men, and men dressed as women,  and straight actors playing gay ones, and who knows - maybe there was even gay ones playing straight ones - and guess fucking what? No one fucking cares. No one. So those of you going on about the yeller face, get a fucking life. We don’t care. We the white folks who put up with the people of the world dressin’ up like white folks, in white face, heck you can even do a cakewalk on my penis, if you are a good lookin’ young woman, and Tokyo Joe will give you a special prize.

Cloud Atlas. It’s got fuck-all to do with yellow face or any other kind of face. And it’s a really amazing movie. And if you are a Danny Choo anime/otaku freak, you will love this movie friends.

Voted by ESL Teachers in the Kansai Area as Their Favorite Japanese TV Show

Just in time for that weekly event that the ESL professionals in Japan look forward to every week ie Saturday night to Sunday night - otherwise known as 24 hours off - Mud diving J girls in outfits. And for them ESL teachers who especially love this kind of thing, a warning: don't beat off too much to this video because remember, you will need to get back to class on Monday to pay the rent for your closet sized paper thin walled 'room' at your gaijin house. It is from the famous Japanese game show entitled simply "泥の水たまりに飛び込む" or "Jump Into Mud Puddle"

Enjoy.

OOH NOO TOKYO JOE YOU BAD BOY, 

DON'T HURT ME OOH NOO!!!